I’ve always been scared to write this post because it’s a tough subject to speak on. I am notorious for having short relationships and all too often it’s because I rush into things. For some reason our society puts couples on this pedestal and makes that kind of happiness and love seem out of reach if you’re single. That simply isn’t the case though, finding love and happiness outside of a relationship should be your first priority before thinking about committing to someone. Relationships are not easy!!! They’re especially not easy if you’re dealing with mental illness. The constant self doubt, feelings of loneliness, and genuine dislike of oneself can put a serious strain on any relationship which is what I want to talk about today.
From personal experience I can confidently say that being in a relationship while also dealing with mental illness is not easy. I’ve been on both sides of the situation so hopefully I can give a fair perspective on both. Being the mentally ill in the relationship is tough for many reasons but most of all its the constant doubt that will eat away at you and your relationship. No matter how many times your partner tells you how much they love you or want you or need you.. you will simply never believe that. Your depression and anxiety will tell you that you will never be enough: you will never be loved or wanted or needed. That level of self doubt will ruin you and your partner and your relationship so my best advice would be to end the relationship ~crazy concept~. Breaking up doesn’t mean that you will be apart forever and it surely doesn’t mean all communication with this person will be ended but you NEED time to yourself to get better. Recovery is something you do by yourself; you recover for yourself so it truly shouldn’t involve anyone else. Involving someone else in your recovery creates a dangerous dependence that 9 times out of 10 will hurt you and bring you right back to square one.
So with that I want to transition into how to help your significant other if they are struggling with mental illness. This truly does get tricky because it is so circumstantial. Do your best to be patient and empathetic during this process. Try to understand that mental illness is a very powerful thing and can truly transform your partners personality. Push them to get help but don’t try to be their only form of help, they need to seek out professional help! Most of all support them, mental illness is scary and those who are dealing with it NEED a strong support system. If someone breaks up with you because they are struggling with mental illness, don’t fight it. Let them go, let them recover, let them try to piece things back together; if they come back to you then that’s awesome and if they don’t, simply accept it and move on. Find love and happiness and confidence in yourself before committing to someone else. Don’t rush, life is so long and you will meet so many people. Happy Valentines Day!!!
Side Note: I will be taking a break from my blog for a while and I just want to let y’all know. All my lines of communication are still open and I am still here to help anyone who needs help, never hesitate to reach out to me. I love you all dearly and remember that you are ENOUGH!
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline-
1-800-273-8255
Self Care with Claire 
What do you do when you’re the one with mental illness but you don’t want your partner to leave you? You don’t want to leave your partner? That person makes you so happy but you still hate yourself and it damages your relationship. What if y’all are meant to be but your mental illness destroys all happiness you have? What if it’s not always bad but when it does get bad, things turn for the absolute worst? How do you fix yourself and your relationship while dealing with a mental illness you will always have?
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Take a break from the relationship. Even if the relationship isn’t the reason or a trigger for your sadness, you need to take time to figure out your life, by yourself. This doesn’t mean ending the relationship, it means a break in the best way possible. If you are meant to be together you will ALWAYS find your way back. Focus on fixing yourself first, then in most aspects the relationship will fall into place around the new and improved you.
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